Literally constantly feel like fucking shit nowadays. I absolutely fucking hate it tbh. I try my absolute hardest to change what I look like, how I act, even to get along with people. Do you know where it gets me? Fucking nowhere. I don’t even know what it’s like to feel even the slightest bit worth while, just so fucking fed up its unreal. Every now and then I enjoy doing these rants, when it gets too much, but this time im at the fucking edge! I literally cannot stand it anymore, people I think are mates just end up fucking you over or choosing someone ‘better’ when they come along. I find it absolutely hilarious, you can just fake a smile and pretend to be happen and only the people that actually slightly care will try and help, and what I’ve found is I literally have no one like that!
I’m fucking fed up! I try to make an effort with so many people, and do you know where it gets me? Fucking no where! It completely sucks, I actually cannot remember the last time someone actually made the slightest bit of effort with me that was actually genuine, its ridiculous!
Yeah I know I’m not the greatest person to be around, I’m not the smartest or funniest or anything like that but i can guarantee I’ll actually make a fucking effort! The only reason people make effort is just fucking false now anyway. Maybe this seems really cynical but there is always ulterior motives, the only reason anyone actually tries is if they want to find something out or if there is something for them to gain from it!
Also final thing… Do you know what’s fucking annoying? People, male and female who say ‘looks aren’t important’ you know what, Fuck you! if you say that you are a complete and utter idiot and a liar! No one will look at someone ugly and say ‘hold on I bet they’re a nice person’ its so fucking hypocritical its unbelievable. Don’t get me wrong everyone agrees having a good personality is important but unless you are at least moderately attractive do you know what happens, you get taken advantage of and dumped in the fucking friend-zone or just completely ignored anyway. Either way the outcome is fucking shit!
i literally put effort into every friendship or relationship i have and its never fucking reciprocated i dont know why i bother